Worth More , Healing from the Pain

Cried my eyes out for you 

Thrones crossed my feet for you

Still I walked through the stormy seas for you 

Allowed you to ruin me completely

Delayed the process of healing 

Denial, denial and no acceptance

The seven stages of grief were not getting over and my heart wasn't at rest.

You asked for forgiveness, But there was no remorse

An apology without the heartfelt note

And I repeatedly insulted myself by believing in you. 

Coming to my senses, was liking rushing back and forth to the wraths of hell

Thousands of needles pining down in my soul

Healing and self acceptance is a process, that I was ignoring and now I am learning eventually

I needed the experience the truth to be seen naked from my own eyes to save myself from you.

I saw your innocence's and had blind faith to ignore the layers of evil manipulation, the selfish being that you'll always be nothing in the world could stand in your way. You will always be the same blaming others for your mistakes and not standing by the person who loved you so dearly. 

Taking me for granted, you left me in despair when I needed you the most

To be held close into your arms and forget the sorrows and live in the moment of joy solely shared by the purity of love that once we shared. 

You're my pain and for long enough I thought you were my cure

A weight is lifted from my chest and I feel free from your toxicity

I am finally able to cut you, to see through you

Because I understand you were never my cure

I was my cure, the healing was within me and holding onto you brought me down even in my happiest moments I searched for you. You were never the one to be entitled as mine, You never deserved my sincerity, my love, my tears, my joys, my smiles, You never were the one for me. I was blind to chase you and not see myself getting crushed underneath your evilness. I couldn't breath and I prayed to God what am I doing why am I not able to leave you, I was scared to let you go and bared silently the pain in hopes you would change. I never loved nobody with so much loyalty and I forgive you for all the wrong doings you have done to me. I am finally finding my peace because I am accepting my truth I am worth much more. 

Never let yourself get lost in the hopes that the toxic person will change for you, They will never change their ways and every means of coming through is just getting what they want from you for a time being. Cut out the negative people who bring you down and ruin your mental peace. 

Learn to grow, heal and accept what is true and walk pass through the pain not in hopes that holding onto them might bring about a change. Hold on to your sanity, seek the person you were before them carefree and happy smile my dear because things will go your way. 

                                                    Love is happiness and not pain