"I found the good in Good Bye"

 Confessions and promises she made in the past went in vain, Because she kept coming back to the person, she wasn't ready to accept the first time she doubted his actions. Gave him multiple chances poured her heart for him. Allowed him to disrespect her several times and most recently as well. 

Knew within herself that he was not good for her, had all the reasons to end but something within her was so afraid to let him go. She allowed him to abuse her emotionally to such extreme levels that she was blinded to tell any difference between wrong or right. Love is kind and patient and endures every storm with this hope she hanged onto their bond but the honest truth is actually the reality of acceptance and knowing how the other person makes you feel. If without them you feel empty and with them you still feel the same than you're severely damaging your self-esteem and knowing all this still she was deep sea diving in hopes someday the sails would be easy. Read quotes, preached others on loving one self, wrote inspirational quotes but all failed when it came to him. 

Somewhere in her heart and her mind she wasn't able to find peace as she thought her happiness and peace laid within his arms, his closeness.  She herself is not a goddess she too has her fair share of mistakes but she looked at the bright side of the relationship thinking it will bring sweetness one day. He stated his apologies numerous times but none of them were heartfelt and were never followed by the actions that showed sincerity only false promises. 

She thought she would be the light and reignite their love but its a two way thing and he was never  there for her. She knows somewhere in her heart that he cared, she believed that she was his beloved but over the years she has seen him being two faced in everything and she no longer holds onto justifications to ease her mind of his infidelities. 

She too has done wrong in the relationship, but she never lied or cheated on him or ever made him feel worthless. Every time they fought she allowed him back because separation anxiety took hold of her. She feels she has now become psychologically ill where she knows this is the time to let go still she craved for his closeness where he will fight for her and prove her believe that loving him was the best decision. 

The believe ends here where she is cutting all the ropes that lead back to him. She needs to be by herself a person whom she valued first than loving a man like you. Her only regret with herself is why she let him barged in again and again. You took it as her weakness but now this is her experience and she has learned completely what she don't need in her life. She had plans for their marriage, use to cry hearing Ed Sheeran's "perfect" but he never took her seriously when she said she was leaving him, because he knew she would keep running back and hell she did. The Sana inside her is tired and is  exhausted she is not breathing, the knots can only be untangled when she is able to break free from his bed of lies that he created so beautifully that she was bound to believe every word of his. The Sana he knew loved him more than herself and still trusted him despite of all the realities that showed her his true colors. But she knows you'll never change and keeping her believe in you would destroy her forever. The Sana I know is strong, independent, crazy as fuck and highly passionate about everything she loves. And she loved you in every possible way. She's done fixing you, she's done being your pleaser, she's done trusting you. Because you my friend have given her multiple reasons and she has indeed given you multiple redemptions. She is finally walking away from you as she now knows that you'll never love her the way she deserves to be loved because trying to fix this false perception of being in a relationship and trying to work it through broke her every time. She is crying because she never wanted to give up on you, for her you were her first in everything. And for you she was a mere connection, a replacement, a rebound you found online and not a priority. She placed you above all and you ruined her trust not once but countless times. She did loved you and did everything to show you that how much she was pushing herself to be the best for you but you did nothing and now she is on the edge and she wants to make you disappear because she too knew you were a just a prick but she believed in you and now she is thankful to you.

Thank you for teaching her and making her realize that she is stronger than you can ever imagine, that she is worthy of someone who truly loves her and makes her his number one. Thank you for making her realize that she is a priority not someone to be taken advantage of. Thank you for all the reasons that you gave her to see something beautiful is blooming and she deserves every happiness.

As Ariana said : "THANK YOU NEXT" :)